Stress, it is a killer. Seriously. I knew it was coming, I've been close to tears for a few days now, and the other night when I was going to my car I just WANTED to cry because I knew I was going to have a brake down and I just wanted to get it over and done with. And then crawl into my nice warm bed curl up and feel better when I wake up. Nope. Didn't happen. I even tried watching a sad movie. but I was just to damn tired to really care.
So what happens? I wake up today, feeling really really drained. I can't even think strait. I bring my brothers to work, the whole time thinking that I have to talk to one of my managers because I had forgotten to clock out last night and they can fix it so I don't get in trouble for it. Lucky me I had the same manager tonight that I did last night so she fixed it. But I didn't see her until the end of my shift. So I go and get gas in the car. Turns out that I now have to put $40 in the gas tank. only $5 more then I was putting in there before. But still. When I only have 172 for a pay check it bring the accounts down a LOT. So I can't even afford to get out of work early any more. And I'll probably start asking to be extended on my six hour days. -_-' oh joy....not what I want to be thinking about when I can't even keep my eyes open long enough to finish a normal work day.
Anyway. I fill my gas tank, then go to work. Waiting for the bus that takes me to work I remember that there are two movies that I borrowed from the work library that I forgot were due back YESTURDAY. Great, just what I needed. Have them zap money from my already low pay check to pay for the movies that I haven't brought back. And all of this is added onto the fact that I haven't slept well because of this damn cold I am stuck with. Make it to work, find out that the person who was supposed to be doing rest rooms before me called out. And no one has really been able to keep up with them all day. So I spent the first half hour of my shift trying to fix up ONE of the rest rooms at least before going to the 6'O-clock meeting we have every day. Go there and I am BOILING. I mean really super extreamly hot. I had a cold cloth against my forhead and it was not helping much at all. I couldn't tell you a damn thing the manager said either because I was so out of it. For most of the day I couldn't even REMEMBER going to the meeting. After that I went back to my rest rooms checked the second one that I had, it was fairly decent so I go back to the one that's the busiest. Go in the stock room and grab some stuff that I need. Then decide to call my mom and ask her if she could get the two movies for me that were due back if she could get them togeather so I wouldn't have to bother doing it when I got home. Hang up with her then decide I really should get into my rest room and clean it.
The only problem now is, I can't stop crying. Fourty five minutes and I couldn't stop. Finally forced myself to stop because I couldn't deal with it then. I'd ask to go home early, but I couldn't even do that because I had to wait for my brothers to get out of work and then go pick them up. So whether I worked or not I still had to STAY and I would rather be paid for staying there.
Finally make it home. feeling a bit better but still on edge. So I sit down at the computer and...no one's online...well, chaos is on but she was getting ready for bed. And I know form experience that when someone is getting ready to go to bed the LAST thing they want and or need is someone rambling at them about how shitty their day was...Lia's away message was up, but I left her a message anyway saying hi...and then she signed off, probably because last I heard she was sick too. so yeah...i'm going to crawl in bed curl up and go to sleep and pretend this day never happened.